The Ramblings Of A Bride To Be

Written in April, 2023

Last week I was a girlfriend, today I am a bride. 

Or a bride to be. 

But a bride nonetheless. 

I used to wonder if choosing one person and rejecting all others would be hard; maybe a little scary even. But it actually wasn’t. It was peacefully wonderful. Plus, now we know that I don’t have commitment issues after all (I was beginning to wonder). 

I’ve noticed that with engagement comes a shift in dynamics. My boyfriend and I used to hang out. We would work at a coffee shop, or take the dog for a walk, or maybe get a bite to eat. We would do something, which was kind of nothing, but nothing together was something. And we’d always end the day with a game of wordle. Always. 

But wordle isn’t happening anymore. 

Just like that, a tradition has been broken. 

Now when my fiancé walks through the door I give him a hug, and I politely offer him a coffee. Then usher him to whatever section of the house I have a massive whiteboard propped up in it, with “WEDDING HQ” written at the top of it. Done are the days of sitting in coffee shops, pondering about where to eat, or what movie to watch. We’ve got decisions to make. Lots of them. And time is of the essence.

Wedding HQ

I used to have a naive impression that wedding planning would be the most wonderful of times. I’d spend my bridal days in flower shops, picking out arrangements. Or at a little brick bakery located on the corner of some idyllic town square, enjoying a cake tasting. I’ve even looked forward to picking out a color pallet for table linens. But I’ve reached the point where I don’t care about the color pallet anymore. Matter of fact, I have just decided that I will have no color theme. I’ll do white table cloths, and that’s that. It’ll be easy and cheap. NEXT. 

This urgency, and the desire for “easy and done”, is greatly influenced by my deciding that we’re doing a 2 month engagement. Let me rephrase that, I’m getting married in 8 weeks. And I’ve got nothing booked. Nothing but my white table cloths. Many people have questioned this decision for a shorter engagement, myself included. But we’re doing it. So while other brides are picking out their color swatches and floral arrangements, I’m over here researching elopements. 

And I never ever thought I was the elopement type. Not even a week ago. It’s really snuck up on me, and surprised me that I’m even considering it. But in one swoop all my planning would be done, and that’s a very enticing thought. 

So stay tuned for part two where I reveal if I’m eloping or not.

My final takeaway is that people love giving brides advice. Just a tip or two here or there. It could be that the wedding videographer is worth the money, or to not get caught up in the details. But I’d rather someone just tell me that I’m an amazing bride. Tell me that I’m crushing it. I don’t care if you’ve seen me be indecisive or stressed. I don’t care if you’ve seen me cry. Just tell me I’m doing great in this decision bootcamp called wedding planning. And then go tell every other bride you know that she is too. Lie through your teeth if you have to. Say it with your fingers crossed behind your back. But say it nonetheless.